the leave behind works...it's science...HAHA

Cinderella: The leave behind works

 

 

The Leave Behind is a classic dating move, and so it make sense to have a classic Disney princess, Cinderella, demonstrate it. After an enchanting night at the ball with the prince, she disappears, leaving only her glass slipper (actually, a high heel that would make any stripper proud) behind. This is a great tactic, but so many girls get it wrong because they don’t understand how to do it properly. Pulling off the leave behind requires two things: choosing the right item and creating mystery. Let’s be clear here though. You, like a Disney Princess, are a winner, and so the only result that I will consider successful is him heartbreakingly scouring the earth to be with you again.   

 

Now, scientific studies show that 97% of all failed leave behind attempts are the result of leaving the wrong item. This is because almost all women choose to leave the same item at a guy’s place…a bra. Brain scans of women attempting this show that their brains release a chemical that confuses them into thinking he finds this “sexy.” They also hope to prevent other girls from ending up in his room if he has girl’s underwear lying around.  There are two reasons that this doesn't work though: it means you've put out too early, and he isn't going to track you down to return a bra.

 

This should be more obvious that it is, so let me clarify. If you have stayed at his place and left a bra, it means you have probably already hooked up. So he doesn't need to track you down because either: 1) you’ll sleep together again (which means you’ll come to him), or 2) you won’t (which means he has no motivation to go find you). I think it’s necessary to address a specific case of this, where some girls try to get cute and stay over, get half naked and make out, but not put out, thinking this makes the guy “want it more.” This is actually universally despised by all men over the age of 22, and is the dating equivalent of being given a Ferrari, but only being allowed to steer. After one ride, you just lose interest.

 

 

So if the most commonly used item is ineffective, what does work? The basic rule is to leave something that he will be willing to bring to you and won’t make it too easy to find you…jacket, phone, maybe those earrings you took off at the after party and told him “don’t let me forget these.” If you really want to do this right you should carry a leave behind wallet with you that contains 1) your picture so that he can use it to describe (and daydream about) you during his search, 2) a non-working debit card to make it seem urgent that it’s returned, 3) various items to make you seem awesome (movie ticket stub to recent action movie, old tickets to a sports event, Victoria’s Secret receipts), and 4) some clues he can use to find you.

 

The last thing you need to do to make the leave behind work is to create some mystery about yourself. After all, Cinderella didn't talk the prince’s ear off about her pet mice or her dysfunctional family. She just walked in, started dancing, and disappeared when he was on the hook.

 

Don’t take my word for it. It's science. By the way, when this works for you, please record it as the first instance of someone getting laid because they know math.