legitimacy

i was standing in the middle of the ace hotel.  i did my hair.  wore a sweater over a collard shirt.  kept it casual with jeans and converse.  a very typically preppy new york look yet and at 30 i should be that confident adult in a very adult new york place but yet for some reason i still felt like a child.  a little confused.  a little lost.  a little apologetic.  a little defensive.  what is it exactly?  i spend money.  a lot of money.  i do a lot of stuff. i treat people with respect.  i know what i want.  im knowledgeable in the menu. in the area. in the ambience. in the history.  yet....is this a self fullfilling feeling?  and that's the fight.  to gain legitimacy.  maybe i'm too carefree and too happy.  u lose that sense of groundedness when u're having too much senseless fun of the moment. i vow to change certain things that have been addressed as of late.

 

elleybody lubuh it elleybody lub it

i don't need rape whistle.  i have rape voice.

karaoke olympics.