being too non-chalant has caused me to really think about some comments that people have said about me lately. its all spawned from truth yet it's taken on a whole new meaning because i've not stopped the tangent of jokes rather i fuel it because i think its' funny. whereas i feel im pretty stubbornly strong willed to not heed whatever anyone else says and still go along my own ways. in certain senses i have weak moral fiber in other ways i have very strong principles. so to clarify, its that i stick to a smaller quantity of hardened values and a larger buffet of items i give a greater flexibility for. whatever it may be, that equilibrium of outward portrayal needs to come meet my real being otherwise im gonna be at a loss for myself. and a lot of the problems that people may see in me, all stem from a bigger issue. which is that i've been betting on my own life, and since it hasn't worked out as i've planned, it's spawned by products of 2nd market betting. if in 2 years, things all work out, in hindsight, all things wash away.
u'll be robbed by a girl. we'll have to come and check up to see if you're still alive.
susan...the half heug.
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