church...

u know what scares me at church?  it's those women singing up on stage with their arms open and palms open as if they were ready to catch a big watermelon falling from the sky.  their heads tilted up and their faces stuck in a waxlike state of constipated happiness.  the smiles are so wide that bees could build a hive by the time the medley concluded and the frizzy hair and the boyz 2 men outfits are almost forgotten under that sheen of contrived conviction.  it scares me. 

but every so often.  i welcome the devout horror or sunday mornings.  too much of the world is driven on religion that it's always good to reconnect with the messages of faith in the world.  today's sermon was given by a south carolinian ex nhl player.  he wore an oversized blue striped button and jeans with generic loafers as he paralleled mark brunell's career with the message of "one's personal dedication not to world but to the one and only jesus christ".  b/c i grew up a jock in the 'burbs, i completely understood the happy gilmore references, the nhl quotes, who mark brunell was.  but i think i'd prefer an asian speaker.  or at least a northerner preacher.  someone that came off a lil less southern wholesome and threw in a bit more of that sarcastic edge.  a converted jew would be perfect.  a philathropic devout capitalist.  either way.  i think i've had my fill for the next few months.   or until the air conditioner gets fixed. 

ugh.