my newest creedo....
larry referred to me and him as "anna and the crane" today...without fully realizing how perfectly poignant this title was, with a little spelling correction to "ana and the crane" (ana being short for anorexic)...and so being angry with the newly crowned title especially after adpoting my newest creedo (see above)....i downed my protein shake and made reservations at Mo-Mo Paradise, all you can eat sukiyaki, as to the delight of 'the crane' who has been craving for his second opportunity to take down the record of 18 plates of BEEF....and so at 7.55pm me and janie "the mutilator" yang show up to find 'the crane' waiting for us at the entrance of the restaurant in his best "all you can eat" attire donning his newest neck pendullum....a bluetooth earpiece for his cell phone which replaced the previous much bulkier digital camera...
i'll have to say that sukiyaki has seemed to be a task in itself to cook and eat all at once due to fast cooking time, egg yolk beating, meat dipping, vegetable placement, beef separation, beverage ingestion and extra order tasking...and as quick as i was to create a more comfortable eating mis-en-place, the crane cooked and ate the first plate...he then proceeded to eat the next 3 plates in 15 minutes before slowing down to a more moderate pace....
even though i doubted 'the cranes' big mouth and predicted that the 3 of us combined wouldn't finish 17 plates (we finished 14 plates of beef collectively), i kept my mouth shut with negative comments and open with rhetorical, taste of your own regurgetated preaching, inspiration for 'the crane' as he chowed down...."stay focused larry, stop playing with your phone and ear piece, stop counting the number of plates of beef and just stay focused on your stomach....talk to your stomach....let it know....let it know to take down more....", and as predicted 'the crane' faltered at 8 plates of beef with 'mutilator yang' at his neck yelping "larry you loser! stop messing around! where did larry go? he went to throw up didn't he? he left the table without his cell phone so we wouldn't call to get him back! KEEP EATING LARRY! STOP BEING SUCH A WUSS...YOU'RE ONLY AT 9...AT LEAST 13!...COME ON LARRY! HURRY UP! EAT YOUR MEAT!...oh excuse miss can you bring out another plate?" just as defeat sunk it's teeth into 'the cranes' big mouth....and if kicking salt into the wounds of a glutton wasn't enough...."BOOO TO LARRY" pictures were taken by 'mutilator yang' to sabotage the wallpaper and screen saver of his new phone....
"my body is aching...wait...i just need to burp...i can't burp...ugh..it hurts....oh man...i'm sleepy...i'm soo full...oh it hurts"
he cheesed the ninth plate, actually i'm not even sure if he finished it, mutilator ordered and cooked it while crane head to the bathroom for what was the ending 'shit' of the fiasco....all that pain...all that protein....
'the crane' is gonna go crazy at the gym tomorrow....
hilarious....
7 comments:
hahaha larry looks like he's in pain!
mm, i've never had sukiyaki, i'm sure i can get it somewhere here.... mmm.... all you can eat meat!
i dunno but i imagine if i were high i could eat the place out of business.
what is that? the power of now. and i am freaking hungry. damn you. damn you all!
You should rock the red ana bracelet. Right wrist!
dude do you not live in NY anymore??? when did this happen?!
u know... been looking through your entries... who ever gave you permission to take that pic of me in my drunken stupor? anyway, so when you comin thru again mr nomad?
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