"The woman was on the chubby side.  Young and beautiful and all that went with it, but chubby.  Now a young, beautiful woman who is, shall we say, plump, seems a bit off.  Walking behind her, I fixated on her body.

Around young, beautiful, fat women, I am generally thrown into confusion.  I don't know why.  Maybe it's because an image of their dietary habits naturally congeals in my mind.  When I see a goodly sized woman, I have visions of her mopping up that last drop of cream sauce with bread, wolfing down that final sprig of watercress garnish from her plate.  And once that happens, it's like acid corroding metal:  scenes of her eating spread through my head andI lose control.

Your plain fat woman is fine.  Fat women are like clouds in the sky.  They're just floating there, nothing to do with me.  But your young, beautiful, fat woman is another story.  I am demanded to assume a posture toward her.  I could end up sleeping with her.  That is probably where all the confusion comes in.

Which is not to say that I have anything against fat women.  confusion and repulsion are two different things.  I've slept with fat women before and on the whole the experience wasn't bad.  If your confusion leads you in the right directoin, the results can be uncommonly rewarding.  But of course, things don't always take the right course.  Sex is an extremely subtle undertaking, unlike going to the department store on Sunday to buy a thermos.  Even among young, beautiful, fat women, there are distinctions to be made  Fleshed out one way, they'll lead you in the right direction; fleshed out another way, they'l leave you lost trivial, confused.

In this sense, sleeping with fat women can be a challenge.  there must be as many paths of human fat as there are ways of human death."

 

-hard boiled wonderland and the end of the world