classic hoan on vacation

it's been a while since i've felt like i've accomplished a decently written brain fart of tangents above tangents, sarcasm upon sarcasm, and inside jokes laden with more inside jokes which don't need the supplemental fotos of debauchery.   and after a weekend of constant real time updates with talk of eventually turning this blog into a bestselling memoir...i've got to somehow muster the juices of past.   i'm reading sedaris' "when u are engulfed in flames"...other than the fact that i haven't found anything other than his first book 'me talk pretty one day' hilarious, i still do appreciate his style of prose.  the essay format, focused on one aspect of life, or one aspect of a situation, fit into one chapter and completely innundated with sarcastic self-misery.   "the world is out to get me" and in its own self loathing misery, it's hilarious.  it'd probably be a bit tougher for my immediate peers of carefree lushs to exhibit any form of "misery loves company"  but there will be some form of compensation.  maybe extra homosexual references.  esp when it comes to hoan.

when your bromances reach the decade mark, the dynamic during the first five years really aren't much different than the latter five years.  it's just become more laden with stories upon stories of, in essence, the same thing.  and in essence, they never cease to be hilarious.  hoans complete existence is one walking comic strip.  from his 27 inch waist, to his obsessive compulsive cloth pho-lding and the way he gels his hair after he puts on his ski goggles.   this isn't one of those "ode to my boyfriend" type posts, but rather a much needed pointing out of the obvious.  he's a small fragile boy.  who as he inches closer to 30.  still looks 13.  still talks with his wussuh yo accent.  still takes forever to get ready.  still is the weakest most delicate and prettiest person i know.  male or female.  and he really does. have a vagina.

"hoan...why are you bringing hair gel with you to the wedding??"
"what if my hair falls apart"
"HAAAAAA"

"hey alex....u accelerate through your turns yea?"
"yea..."
"can you brake when you turn?  i don't feel well"

"thanks for dealing with me yo"

"pocket square"

"yo....lets call her again...and make sure she's not at pho danh 1"

"i just wanna eat some soft bread"

"gimme that bread...lemme hug the bread"